Cultivating Healthy Habits Helps Busy Moms
by Jennifer Kelley, guest blogger
This Working Mom Starts Her Day Choosing Herself First. Here’s Why It Works.
My morning routine used to look like this: drag myself out of bed, get the kids up and moving, make breakfast and pack lunches before hustling us out the door. Then I’d dive into work determined to be the model employee as I simultaneously handled dishes, laundry and coordinating the household.
I justified my complete self-neglect by telling myself that his is what “Super Mom” looks like. I had no time for luxuries like sitting quietly sipping coffee, taking purposeful pauses or doing anything just for myself. My value and validation came from being everything to everyone all the time.
Until I noticed myself starting to dread the evenings and the inevitable chaos that ensued post 5 p.m. The apologies of “not today,” when my son asked to play a board game. The internal countdown to 7:30 p.m. when everyone would be in bed. I started to realize that no one wins when I try to do it all with nothing leftover. And that had to change. These were the moments I wanted to enjoy. And my family deserved better.
Why I Get Me Time First Now
I remembered the book Atomic Habits by James Clear and its’ concept tiny gains made consistently over time transform your life and identity. So, I set a simple intention: I will choose me first today.
I began waking 30 minutes earlier (initially painful I won’t lie!) to sit quietly with coffee journaling, praying and setting priorities for my day. Selecting workout clothes the night before made movement so much easier in the morning. I put healthy snacks right up front in my pantry so grabbing an apple rather than a cookie became automatic. Tiny cues to choose self first.
These micro habits cut into the time I used to spend tackling my mile-long to do list or getting everyone else up and fed. But, here’s what I discovered: when I intentionally start my day focused on what I need, the hours that follow hold exponentially more ease, joy and achieved goals.
Choosing Me Overflows Into Choosing Us
Rather than constant urgency, I now move steadily with focus listening better to my colleagues and kids. My improved mood from adequate sleep and nutrition transforms our family time into playing games rather than scolding over chores. With more emotional margin now, I happily sit down to play Legos with my son and dress up with my daughter.
Choosing myself first starts a positive domino effect, so I ultimately serve my family better. As James Clear wisely writes, “What’s easy to do becomes automatic with time.” After focused consistency over weeks, my new ritual stuck and the gains moved well beyond just me feeling better.
My days now run on efficiency I never knew was possible by putting myself first. I stress less while accomplishing more. It turns out self-care isn’t selfish, but the fuel for giving back better.
Give Yourself Permission to Choose You
The airplane safety guidance says to secure your oxygen mask first before trying to assist others. Working mamas, you know this truth deep down. It’s time to give yourself full permission to make getting your needs met a non-negotiable daily.
Start tiny if needed: waking up 10 minutes earlier, squeezing in a 10-minute walk outside, making sure you have a good breakfast. Over time these small changes become your new normal and create momentum for bigger habits.
Then watch what unfolds when you boldly declare, “I come first today.” See how choosing yourself first multiplies time and energy for everything that matters most.
Self-care is not something you fit in, but how you become fit for the journey. This working mom starts "me-first" now. With the coming of a new year, I invite you to join me! What small habits can you start doing today?
Jennifer Kelley is a married mother of two living in Cary, N.C. As a certified nutrition and fitness coach, she helps women take control of their wellbeing through personalized guidance on nutrition, exercise and lifestyle changes.